I looked back in my journal this morning and was struck again at how fast everything has happened. Like most of you, I've been trying to adapt to a new normal, trying to manage my concern about family and friends, trying to get sleep and outdoor time and some modicum of peace amidst the prevailing anxiety.
A long-time student wrote me today. She's working on her second book; her first came out last year. But she's been completely stalled these past weeks, no writing possible. She asked for any thoughts or tips I could share on keeping the writing going during these uncertain times.
I wanted to tell her, It's the same for me. I had a call with my agent last Friday to talk about future strategies, and I almost cancelled because it felt so irrelevant. Then my wonderful writing group met this Wednesday for two hours to workshop 100 pages of my new novel, and again, I had the thought of begging off, which I never do. I didn't. I enjoyed both touch-in's, the agent advice (she's so smart!) and the writing group (they are too!), and I also appreciated the real distraction--the opening back to my real life, in a way.
It's hard to make room for these openings, though. I don't know how you're handling the crisis, personally, but I've had to declare a Facebook, Instagram, and news fast for myself. Even five minutes online and I'm swamped by despair. Yesterday, I spent three hours carefully restocking fresh fruit and vegetables--the process of shopping is so exhausting, although our small community is lucky to still have that option, where some are completely without. I came home, fell into a nap, then only wanted to watch romcom before bedtime.
But you know all this. You've been figuring it out for yourself: how to stay safe, well, and keep your family the same.
I've worked as an editor and coach for decades with quite a few writers who are working on stories of trauma--from war to abuse to murder. I am not a psychotherapist, but I do understand the creative process. You can't both live trauma and write about it.
Here's what I mean: when we are living through trauma, all our creative resources are tied up in our survival. Only with some distance can the writing flow again.
But you can journal--and journaling is often an incredible healer, a doorway back to the "real" writing.
This week, I came across a wonderful three question exercise from blogger Lauren Hubele, a homeopath from Texas. I get her weekly blog, which always has good thoughts and other help for healthy living. She and her adult child were talking about the crisis and they discussed three questions. I took them into my journaling that morning with my spouse, and we discussed afterward. I tell you, they made a huge difference in how I felt about life and future. I even found myself back in my writing, tiptoeing into my real life again, after.
The questions:
1. What are the things that really scare you right now?
2. In what areas are you feeling powerless?
3. What action or actions can you take to feel empowered?
I wrote for a good half hour, coming up with things that surprised me. Narrowing down the scariest fears, for me personally, helped me distance from them emotionally. David Hanscom, back surgeon and author of Back in Control, has a similar approach with his patients: to write out what you're most angry about, sparing nothing, then tear up the page and throw it away. That's worked for me too. The technique is the same: get the scary, rage-filled, panicky feelings onto the page, to give them distance and let them release.
Before this, the regular writing couldn't happen. At least not for me.
Some of my writing friends aren't this way. Their writing is their prime sanity and distraction in these times. One colleague posted an impromptu Nanowrimo-style invite on his Facebook feed: Who wants to use this month to fast draft a book? He got 92 responses. I could see this working well--the urgency gets translated into production. But for me, I need a few steps before this can happen. We're all different.
My best wishes for you and your family and loved ones during this time. Stay safe and well. Try the journaling ideas above--use what little creativity you feel you have to calm the spirit and bring back some hope. As a sign on the nearby gym said, We can beat this!
PS My scheduled writing retreat in Santa Fe is going virtual (March 30-April 3) and I'm getting excited about helping writers distract themselves and make progress on their books via our Zoom meetings and my feedback. If you're interested in joining us last minute, please do. I'm offering more benefits in this week than I do in my usual week-long retreats, a lot more one-to-one coaching too. Link is in the sidebar to the right.
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